Trish and Mark, A Wink and A Smile
Like most little girls, I dreamed of someday being married and having a beautiful wedding. But as I got older, I re-evaluated that dream and realized I didn’t want to be married just because “that’s what you do.” I wanted to wait til I found my very best friend.
Then, as I got even older, I started having recurring dreams that were more like nightmares. At night I would dream of rushed weddings and being thrown down the aisle against my will. I didn’t have a chance to pick out any of the wedding details, not even the groom. The “Big Day” would happen without a lot of the things a girl looks forward to, like having your dad walk you down the aisle or putting a veil in your hair. After I started having these recurring dreams, getting married moved from being a beautiful possibility and goal for my life to a nightmare and something that struck fear in my inner-being. After my fear of snakes, marriage became my biggest fear!
These wedding nightmares continued for years. I began to think they possibly meant that marriage just wasn’t for me. I kept convincing myself of that as I watched most of my friends get married over the last few years. Maybe I just wasn’t the marrying type.
A few years ago, I hit the “Big 3-0”, and I was single. That was not part of the dream when I was a little girl. In 30 years, I had still not found anyone I was willing to overcome my fear for. But there was something about flipping that decade that made me think, “It’s either now or never, so I better make the most of every opportunity.” I signed up for an online dating service and sent out a “wink” to a guy with a fabulous smile and an interesting profile. He winked back and thought I had a really great smile and an equally intriguing profile. We began emailing, and you know if someone can make you laugh over an email, they’ll be able to make you laugh even more in person! Plus, we realized we knew multiple people in common and were surprised our paths hadn’t crossed before (or maybe they had and we just didn’t know it)! So we arranged to meet in-person as a mutual acquaintance was playing at a local coffee shop. We spent the rest of that night walking side by side around the Old Market and talking for hours. Mark hasn’t left my side since that night two and a half years ago.
Somewhere in those two years and many hours of conversation, he has become a part of my soul. He became my best friend without my realizing it. He became the One I’ve waited for since I was a little girl. And even though it’s taken us two years for me to triumph over my nightmares, Mark has become the One I’m willing to overcome my fears for to walk through life together. I can’t wait to live out this dream with him and to someday have “babies with big smiles” together. It just goes to show that even when you’ve started giving up, your dream can begin with a wink and a smile (which, coincidently, is the song we will be dancing to as husband and wife, “Wink and a Smile”).
PS-With The Fountains gang running our day, I know it will be beautiful. And I am confident they won’t let me forget to put on my veils or have my dad walk me down the aisle!